Picture but no sound.

Jen and I fell out this weekend. She was/is extremely angry that only a few weeks after surgery and only 1 week after being given a stay of execution for chemotherapy, I am throwing myself into football and cricket business and in her mind "taking too much on". My defence is/always has been that if a job is worth doing its worth doing properly and so because I'm a bit of a perfectionist "you like to dot the i's and cross the t's" is another of her favourites, we didn't speak to each other much over the weekend hence the title of this blog.

It has been a busy week this week with a whole range of different activities going on.

Tuesday evening saw my first Finance & Premises Committee of the academic year at Mabs Cross Primary School where I am vice chair of governors. I chair this particular committee which looks after the money and the school buildings.

Immediately following this on the 6th November the cricket section AGM took place. As junior section coordinator I am required to write and present a report to the meeting. The Chairman had asked that they be sent to him by Sunday 4th. Therefore Sunday morning was taken up by writing the report, compiling statistics and setting out plans for the section for 2013. As a senior player I also wrote the 3 XI report on behalf of the 3XI skipper who I knew was away on holiday and wouldn't meet the Sunday deadline.

The cricket club have also agreed to replicate the football club by selling club hoodies in aid of Myeloma UK. I had also agreed to co-ordinate the cricket sections order. I therefore took a range of hoodies to the club for people to try on before ordering, took orders and money.

Following the meeting in which it became apparent that we needed to raise some funds urgently to pay for some much needed drainage, I set about planning a fund raiser, which I circulated to a select few.

An all too familiar sight at Bull Hey this year - drainage is essential

On Wednesday night I researched and planned my training sessions for the Greens and Whites the following evening.

On Thursday I was on leave from work as I had to go to MRI for the skeletal survey. In the afternoon I visited B&Q to buy ground equipment - brushes, spades, forks, sand, soil to carry out some work to the pitches at Cale Lane. I had learned earlier in the week that there was some holes in the pitch that were unsafe. I also knew the pitches were wet. This rather annoyed me as several people knew about these holes but rather than do anything about it, simply said "the pitch isn't fit". On Thursday afternoon I spent at Cale Lane with a colleague filling holes, forking water away, cutting and laying turf sods etc.. All this so we could get some games on that Saturday.




We dug that puddle out, sanded and soiled it then laid turf

Thursday evening was spent delivering the previously planned coaching sessions - both teams seemed to be incredibly distracted which left me reviewing the sessions later Thursday evening to see where they might have gone wrong.

After getting in from training at 8.15pm and putting balls, bibs, cones, etc..away I was straight back out to meet Steve Heaton from Rose Leisure about holding our annual fund raiser and end of season presentation evening. We talked about themes, costs, dates etc.. Last year was a disappointment, poorly attended and didn't make much money - this year needs to be different to reinvigorate interest.

On Friday at lunchtime I went up again to check the pitches due to heavy rain - they would be borderline for Saturdays games.

Saturday morning and I left the house at 7.30am to pack the car with all the equipment we need to get a game on - we were also holding our coffee morning month to raise money for Myeloma UK so additional equipment such as cups, coffee, tea, sugar, milk, stirrers, biscuits, cakes, hot water flasks, camping table etc.. needed to be taken.

The Greens and Aspull Juniors at our Myeloma UK Coffee stall

After putting up, and taking down goal posts, supervising 2 games, putting equipment away in the cabin, locking up, getting home and putting stuff away, cleaning up, reporting results etc. it was too late to take Alex & Callum to Latics as I had promised them - it was 2.30pm.

Sunday morning was spent doing secretary admin - checking the bank account for standing orders, completing the Income and Expenditure sheet on behalf of the Treasurer, Jen, who was out with the children at the roller rink (to make up for missing Latics).

Sunday evening was spent coordinating the charity hoodie order for the cricket club - between the hockey and cricket section we have ordered a fabulous 74 hoodies which means £370  for Myeloma UK.

On Monday evening I attended the league committee meeting on behalf of the club. The Chairman was unable to attend due to having no babysitter and so I went with another coach to represent the club.

On Monday night/Tuesday morning Callum became ill and was sick 5 times through the night. Alex started vomiting at 6.30am this morning and carried on until around 2.00pm this afternoon - I took the day off work to look after them but also to have a bit of a rest too. Yes I forgot to say I work full time too!!

2 poorly boys on the sofa with juice, bucket and SpongeBob on the TV

People say I should delegate more. I am happy to do that but unfortunately there isn't a queue of people waiting to take things off you. I was disappointed that on Saturday parents walked past the coffee stall and didn't offer to help. Jen stood for 3 hours and missed both Alex & Callum and Liams games for the Greens and the Whites as a result. We raised £92 for Myeloma UK which is fabulous, but it was disappointing how people didn't offer to muck in. I was also disappointed that I had to take goal posts down. Its the first time Ive had to do this in 2 years as my parents are usually very good at helping clear away. I hope this week was just a blip.

We provide the players with an awful lot - much more than football and I don't think its unreasonable to expect people to help out a little.

This next week doesn't show any signs of letting up. As well as the usual training, matches etc. I am very excited about a meeting I am going to with Jonathan Jackson, Chief Executive of Wigan Athletic and Councillor Chris Ready about getting my Kit Bank idea off the ground. Latics are brilliant at supporting community initiatives and are keen to get behind the idea. Next weeks blog will be about the Kit Bank.

Jen has warned my though that if I take this on it has to be at the expense of something else. She said "I cant be all things to all people". So I'll either have to set it up and delegate it to someone or drop something else.

Any volunteers? No I thought not!

I will have to do it though, cos I hate it being picture no sound in our house.

You can choose your friends....

The brilliant news is that chemotherapy has been delayed indefinitely. Following my visit to MRI on Friday - it was a family day out due to half term and the children were superbly behaved too, my Myeloma levels remain really high but my haemoglobin levels and kidney function are returning to normal. The likelihood is that my illness throughout summer and subsequent surgery has had an impact on these readings.

I return to MRI this Thursday for a full skeletal survey. This involves numerous X-rays of every major bone in my body from 2 or 3 angles. The purpose is to ensure that the Myeloma isn't causing any bone lesions which is quite common given it exists in the bone marrow. As I've no major bone pain I'm confident on the all clear on this too. Following this I will attend Myeloma clinic at MRI once a month for monitoring. At the point treatment is required all consent forms, permissions etc have been completed and we are good to go with the Myeloma XI trial. Hopefully this will be a long time in the future.

On Friday night it was good to relax and enjoy a beer or 2 with Jen. It was good to see her relax too - the first time that we've enjoyed a meal without the stress and dread that seems to have loomed over us since June.

As mentioned in previous blogs I believe children, and adults for that matter, should play as many sports as possible. Trying many different activities not only gives the individual a richer experience but also enables them to develop several different circles of friends. I am very fortunate to be involved with 2 fantastic sports clubs and am lucky to have developed some lifelong friendships.

Team Martlew also has a fantastic support network of friends. The support comes from several different circles of friends, from work colleagues to school friends to neighbours, but many are friends that we have made at the 2 sports clubs and these friendships have developed and blossomed over the past few years. Without the messages of goodwill, the practical support and the listening ears, it would have been an incredibly difficult summer - far more difficult than it has been.

It's essential that sports clubs provide the opportunity to play sport on a variety of levels. Different people have different motivations to play sport. Some wish to play on a serious level, wishing to be the best and compete at the very highest level. Often this may be at district/town team level or even professional club/county level. Often many of these types of players do not stay at any particular club for a long time, moving round to different clubs, taking the view that the next club may offer a better development opportunity. There is nothing wrong with this and it is a fact of life.

Some players motivation is to play for enjoyment and its essential that clubs offer this facility too. These players are the ones that will make up the large majority of your membership, and are the future of your club. If you retain them, by providing opportunities to play for enjoyment, then you are likely to produce future coaches, secretaries, Child Welfare Officers, groundsman etc from this cohort.

At Whelley Alexandra and Wigan Cricket Club, I believe we have struck the right balance between these 2 drivers for involvement. At the cricket club there is a pathway from the youngest junior cricket team to the first team. We provide a variety of coaching on this pathway from the fun and enjoyment side at the very early age to focused group and 1:1 coaching at the higher end - we even have a New Zealand Test opening batsman, our pro Aaron Redmond, who is available to do 1:1 batting sessions - I challenge any club in the area to match that!!

At the football club it's slightly different. We do insist on fun and enjoyment no matter what level (I hate the word division) the team plays at. However what we find is the higher the team rises in the divisions, the more transient the players become. We do have a hardcore cohort of players that have been there since day one, but around them players come and go with more regularity as they look for "the next best thing". Sadly this can often be a parent rather than a player decision.

My hope for my children playing cricket and football at the 2 clubs is that they have fun, enjoy themselves and make some lifelong friends along the way. I would also like them to stay loyal, develop to the best of their ability and when the time is right develop new skills such as refereeing or umpiring, scoring or officiating, coaching or another volunteering role to put something back into the club that has served them well over the years.
This is already happening at the cricket club with some of our younger senior cricketers. They have taken the view that they should help the next group of young players coming along by taking their coaching qualifications. It makes me incredibly proud to see 19 and 20 year old young men choose to coach rather than us having to twist reluctant dads arms up their backs. As a result I believe that the quality of coaching is better as it wasn't that long ago they were in the position of the learner.

Already at the football club we have under 14s players asking about coaching and refereeing courses. We have elder brothers who will become qualified coaches later this year and are willing to specialise in areas such as goalkeeping, to help develop the younger goalkeepers at the club. Add to that the maturity that many of our older players are now beginning to display, helping tidy up at the end of the session, not requiring prompting to undertake a warm up or cool down, makes me really proud and positive that the future of both clubs is rosy but the future or these young people is even rosier.